Reinventing ME

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Last year for lent I emailed Katie to tell her I was giving up pregnancy.  She responded with something along the lines, “is this for real or have you just had enough?”  Well, it was true, I went into labor and had Henry on lent last year.  Best thing I ever gave up 🙂

While I’m not Catholic, I feel the need to give up things for lent to prove to myself that I can live without certain items.  This year however, instead of giving up pregnancy, I’m going to focus on Reinventing ME.  You might ask what does this mean, but really I’m not quite sure.  I just know the last time I reinvented myself it was to become a mom.  Now that I’ve been at this gig for one year I feel even more confident in myself as a mom and person.

Recently, I’ve had an eye opening epiphany that what I think is important, really isn’t.  I find that a lot of what I think it important can be too materialistic or vain.  Not necessarily who I am, but who I’ve become. Since I’ve survived the first year of motherhood, almost four years as a wife, and twenty six years as myself, it’s time for change.  My main New Years resolution was to do more for myself and find inner happiness.  I can honestly say that I’m well on my way to doing that, but theres so much more I want to do for myself and my family.

To be honest, a lot of days I don’t feel all that grown up.  Sure I have a family, a house and a job, but that doesn’t necessarily make you a grown up.   I still spend money like an irresponsible teenager, have terrible eating habits and spend more time social networking than I should.  Lately, it’s just become to monotonous.  I feel like a lot of who I am and have become is holding my family back from being the family that I truly see us being.  I want dinners at the table, a new house, go to church often, family vacations, grow my blog, movie nights, more babies, dinner parties, etc.  Sure, I have a lot of that now, but our life is so fast paced that there really isn’t that time to breathe.  Or is there? Am I just picking and choosing what’s important? I decided that now is as better time than ever to start fresh. Find what’s truly important and make it work.

Yesterday, I did something that hasn’t been done since my freshman year of college.  I paid off our credit cards (not too shocking, it happens monthly), cut up the one that I have memorized and cancel it.  All of this for no reason other than I’m a one click shopper.  It’s SO easy for me to store my credit cards in my accounts, find something I like and then click order completed.  It’s RIDICULOUS! My family members often joke that UPS will never go out of business because of me.  My closet is FULL of clothes that I NEVER wear.  I also own tons of shoes.  Instead of ordering something new everyday (really I have a problem) why not create new outfits out of what I have.  Hopefully we’ll see an increase in our bank account and comments will stop being made about me and the UPS man!

While cutting up my credit card is just a very small (actually HUGE) move on my goal of reinventing myself I feel refreshed already.  A huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders just by doing that. I’ve unsubscribed to ALL shopping emails, made us eat dinner at the table as a family last night and spent far less time on my phone after work.  I also have been getting up at 5am again, am working on a healthy eating style for our family and am truly contemplating a “make older”  (that’s a hole different post)!

I’ve told my husband none of this.  My inability to change is something that he has brought up many times in our relationship.  He even mentioned it this weekend while we were away.  It’s time, really it is.  For the record, we have a great relationship, albeit odd at times, but truly wonderful.  I know with letting go of stupid things, putting other things first and taking a little time to smell the roses, it will be out of this world.

I don’t anticipate this is a change that will happen overnight, but with spring coming, maybe coming, why not start off on a great note.  Take the next step to a new and better you!

 

 

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8 thoughts on “Reinventing ME

  1. I completely understand the not feeling like a grown up even though we’re grown ups thing. I have a house, two kids, good husband..everything I hoped for at the age I hoped for it. But sometimes I still feel like I’m just playing this grown up role and that I’m kind of not there yet. I think for me, it’s a self-confidence thing. I expected that when I “grew up” I would be totally self-assured and have a lot more answers than questions, but I’m finding more the opposite is true. Anyway, I’m not Catholic (anymore) but I still think it’s a good idea to focus on making positive changes! Good luck to you!

  2. I can really relate to this post. I never feel like a grown up, sometimes I make choices that aren’t the best for everyone. I used to spend too much and that’s something that I really have improved on, in the past few years. Good luck. I’m doing a Happiness project on my blog this year and you may want to pick up the book The Happiness Project, it has really helped me make some changes in my life.

  3. Carol

    Allie – I have also read the Happiness Project and if you don’t want to “buy” it you are welcome to use it:))). AND for the record I am also waiting to feel grown up however, there will never be a “trying to look older” effort over here!!!

  4. This is awesome and inspiring to me. There are so many changes I want to make now that we are on the downward slope of the first year. The first one I’ve made is finding spaces for J’s clutter that consumes the kitchen and living room. But I need to make time for personal changes as well. Thanks for always having such great wisdom and advice – even when you don’t know how much it is helping me!

    • Hey, what can I say, we Burlington girls sure know how to inspire one another through this adventure of motherhood! Clutter was and still is a huge issue for me. It’s NEVER ending. However, now that we’re off the bottle and baby food, my cupboards don’t look so scary any more. The toys regions, well that’s another story.

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